Texas Man, Do You Mean Florida Man?

Photo from Dallas Morning News.

Everything is bigger in Texas, as they say. Especially for the crime. It seems as if some of the dumbest criminals come straight out of the longhorn state. Florida Man and his stories can be found online almost anywhere. But nobody has encountered Texas Man, Florida Man’s crazier and far more reckless brother. Unsurprisingly, many thought they could get away, but their stupidity got in their own way! This article is composed of Texas Man’s notorious exploits, and arrests in 2017. 


Getting More Out of Jury Duty. 


People of Smith County were lining up for a civic duty that many aren’t too excited about. Jury Duty. But one individual wanted to take the edge off his chore more than the rest of the potential jurors. Rather than bringing something to read or catching up on work while waiting, he kept himself occupied under the influence. Taylor Huckaby arrived at the courthouse and appeared to be under the influence of alcohol. Smith County sheriff’s deputies said Huckaby was stumbling while in the jury room. 23-year-old Taylor Huckaby was charged with public intoxication when deputies approached him carrying a cup. 


Texas Woman Reports Her Own Home Invasion. 


In Leander, Texas, police responded to a call in the middle of the night from a private home. It seems as if someone had broken into the home. However, authorities found an older woman who broke into the house and began beating a young boy with a stick. Sara Aranda obtained entry into the house and found the boy sleeping. She proceeded to hit the boy while yelling. Apparently, she asked the boy who else was in the house. But authorities weren’t able to get any more details out of the night. As there are very few reports made to the public regarding this incident. The boy was uninjured and nothing was taken from the house.


Age is No Barrier In Road Rage! 


It seems as if the age difference for crimes in Texas doesn’t matter. 76-year-old Jay L. Brumbaugh was arrested on two counts of aggravated assault w/ a deadly weapon after a road rage incident. Brumbaugh pursued a couple after an obscene gesture was made. The situation escalated quickly after Jay had taken out a gun concealed in his vehicle. Brumbaugh’s response to the drivers who flipped him off was to fire three shots at their vehicle. That isn’t the end. The car the two victims were in pulled into the Palo Pinto Sheriff’s office east parking lot, while Brumbaugh who was driving a white Toyota Prius, went past the law enforcement center, turned, and went around the county courthouse before turning back onto U.S. 180 to head eastbound. Luckily, nobody was injured. Police tracked Brumbaugh and placed him under arrest. 


Robbery Victim Gets More Items!


It doesn’t take smarts to be a criminal, you’ve probably learned by now. 20-year-old Ciraco Balmaceda and other accomplices were arrested after police identified one of the individuals by identification papers left behind at a house they were attempting to burglarize. The three men were confronted by an armed homeowner who fended off their property. The trio ran for the hills, leaving some important items behind. In his panic, Ciriaco Balmaceda left his ID. Which authorities used to locate him. There are more shocking details to this case that can be found. (Be advised that there’s a paywall on this link.) 


The Temper of Texas Man… Taken Too Far.


There’s a common annoyance we homeowners all have. But Texas Man took it too far. Some of us may have a “No Solicitors” sign on our lawn or on our door. You put that outside on your property to deter bible salesman, Girl Scouts, and any other door salesmen. But it doesn’t prevent the majority of them from still knocking on your door and convincing you to purchase their product or service. This would still make a sensible person pretend they’re not home. Or just refuse to answer the door. Radu Chivu isn’t a sensible person. A roofing salesman ignored the sign and knocked on the door, Chivu opened up. Chivu then proceeded to shoot the salesman. Chivu insisted on the justified response because the salesman was warned by the sign. The salesman was taken to the hospital and Chivu was charged with aggravated assault w/ a deadly weapon and was taken into custody by police.